Are you a douchebag neuroscientist/psychologist?

With apologies to many of my friend, cobloggers and tweeps, I think a large proportion of Psychology and Neuroscience is full of shit. I have no scientific basis for a lot of this statement. It is my opinion, subject to change at my whim. But seriously guys, do believe half the crap you claim you find in your results?? Let just be honest here. You’re just trying to get some pubs so you keep your job. Hey, its ok! We all do that. Whatevs…

But you are so full of shit. Its really the touchy feely crap though, lots of the other shit is all right. But why does it seem that in Psychology/Neuroscience there are lots of people who either A) looks like douchebags or B) come off extremely douchey when they talk.

So I figured I’d come up with a test to tell if you are a douchebag neuroscientist or psychologist.

1) Do you study anything to with spirituality?

2) Is your study organism a family pet?

3) Do go by Dr. Phil?

4) Is the only way to sell your research to be all like, OMG your pets REALLY ARE just like you, please continue to treat them as if they were you fucking children.

5) Are you really just trying to sell copies what promises to be an extremely mind-numbing douchey book that comes out in 2011?

Then you might just be a douchebag neuroscientist/psychologist! Case in point: Douchecovery Channel News.

“Meager as it is, available evidence says, ‘Yes, animals can have spiritual experiences,’ and we need to conduct further research and engage in interdisciplinary discussions before we say that animals cannot and do not experience spirituality.”

Seriously, whats the fucking point? Maybe a psycho person can enlighten my black heart. Who gives a fuck except crazycatlady and crzydolphinlady? What difference does this ¬†research make to improving the world and making fundamental discoveries about the world around us? Do dogs fucking believe in God?? Yippee! They ‘re just as fucked up in the head as people! WOW! Now i guess those pet psychiatrists will feel relieved. I wish people would treat their kids as good as their bloody pets.

What a load of wanking this stuff is!? But hey, I’ll be the first to admit I don’t know what I’m talking about here. I just wish all these psycho academics would show the world the same courtesy.

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5 Responses to Are you a douchebag neuroscientist/psychologist?

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention Are you a douchebag neuroscientist/psychologist? | --

  2. My dogs will beat up your inverts and eat them for breakfast.

  3. Helran says:

    Come on!! Neuroscientist doesn’t mean psychology pathway ahahaha, fortunatly! There are also some fucking cellular/molecular/physiology neuroscientist. This kind of person who explains things with molecules and so on, you see? This kind who doesn’t care about psychology and other shit like that xD

  4. stevie says:

    As far as abnormal pyschology/pyschiatry goes… yeah, I think its largely bullshit. A bunch of generalizations and flowery names for conditions that apparently did not even exist in our parents’ time. I think nothing is more misdiagnosed than “bipolar disorder” (and it’s associated disorders), leading to travesties like not holding murders accountable and force feeding stupefying medications down a child’s throat.

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